warrenellis:

  • frozen banana, one handful
  • blueberries, two handfuls
  • baby spinach, small handful, torn
  • juice of one lemon
  • black grapes, one handful
  • strawberries, one handful
  • one apple, cored and sliced
  • blend until it is purple drank
  • drink
  • hate yourself

excerpt

  • The Giraffe Store: I tend to like kinda girly dude
  • The Giraffe Store: s
  • Silver: yeah
  • Silver: I once broke some guys leg
"

My mom called my doctor and said to him “What’s the most accurate measurement for weighing?”
The doctor said “An underwater weighing test”
And just like that, my mom said “Yes. When can my son and my daughter can take it?” and the doc said “Today at 2pm.”

So, I didn’t bother taking a shower and so did my sister too, so I had to get into a special swimming suit(tight pants…Ugh).

My sister said “Can I pull my hair down to a ponytail?” The doctor said “No.”
So my sister with her long, blonde hair went underwater with 8 seconds and had she must enjoyed it..but I didn’t.

"
someone posted this copypasta on /b/ in like 2003 and whenever anyone asked for clarification on any one of the bizarre non-sequiturs in it he would just reply with shit like “it was an underwater weighing test” or “her hair got wet” and the thread got up to 200 replies before he got banned by two different mods for frustrating the shit out of everyone and this is still the golden standard i hold trolls to (via sexhaver)

indescribable.

i dont even know what to say now that ive finished Rewrite

play it.  words honestly fail me, about the whole thing, about the ending.

lilcoffee:

drug-warrior:

Lmao

😩😩😩

hell yeah